Offenders for the week of February 23, 2015:
#3 GIULIANA RANCIC
OFFENSE: Offensive!
Haven't heard a peep from her, and she's made the list for the second time in three weeks! First, she got her diva panties in a bunch because she felt threatened by Maria Menounos' presence at the E! Network. Now, she's totally flopped like a smelly, dead fish while commentating for the Fashion Police's Oscar special. She tore apart Disney star Zendaya's hair... Her dreadlocked hair. Giuliana said:
"I feel like she smells like patchouli oil... or maybe weed."
I'm sure it's better than what you smell like: contempt and envy. Zendaya was completely taken aback by the unwarranted criticism, but she graciously accepted Fool-iana's public apology.
I'm not sorry for what I'm gonna say, so here goes: Eat a ween; STFU; and as the kids are sayin' nowadays-- Bye, Felicia!
P.S. Read Zendaya's Twitter response below. Classy.
OFFENSE: Offensive!
Haven't heard a peep from her, and she's made the list for the second time in three weeks! First, she got her diva panties in a bunch because she felt threatened by Maria Menounos' presence at the E! Network. Now, she's totally flopped like a smelly, dead fish while commentating for the Fashion Police's Oscar special. She tore apart Disney star Zendaya's hair... Her dreadlocked hair. Giuliana said:
"I feel like she smells like patchouli oil... or maybe weed."
I'm sure it's better than what you smell like: contempt and envy. Zendaya was completely taken aback by the unwarranted criticism, but she graciously accepted Fool-iana's public apology.
I'm not sorry for what I'm gonna say, so here goes: Eat a ween; STFU; and as the kids are sayin' nowadays-- Bye, Felicia!
P.S. Read Zendaya's Twitter response below. Classy.
"Gimme, gimme, gimme!"
#2 MAMA JUNE
OFFENSE: Bad momma
Oh how the red-necky have fallen! Once so beloved and celebrated... Today, so banished and reviled. First, our favorite reality TV mommy was slammed for bumpin' uglies with a known child molester-- a vermin who molested one of her own daughters. Now, in a recent interview on "The Doctors", it's been revealed that her 9-year-old daughter Honey Boo Boo weighs 125 pounds! 125 pounds! I weigh 125 pounds and I'm 5'9"!
WTF!?!?
Boo Boo's Uncle Poodle has witnessed June Bug feeding Boo nothing but fast food--- including a 20-piece chicken nuggets that she gobbled down in a hot minute. In fact, June lets her meal ticket eat anything she wants. Which is not awesome. Way to grow an obese child who now is susceptible to a host of life-threatening illnesses.
But... some positives here:
1. At least Boo Boo won't get trapped in one of June's folds.
2. Perhaps Boo Boo can star in a Godzilla-like remake: "Here Comes Honey Boom Boom".
We can hope that you will burst like the pimple that you truly are!
OFFENSE: Bad momma
Oh how the red-necky have fallen! Once so beloved and celebrated... Today, so banished and reviled. First, our favorite reality TV mommy was slammed for bumpin' uglies with a known child molester-- a vermin who molested one of her own daughters. Now, in a recent interview on "The Doctors", it's been revealed that her 9-year-old daughter Honey Boo Boo weighs 125 pounds! 125 pounds! I weigh 125 pounds and I'm 5'9"!
WTF!?!?
Boo Boo's Uncle Poodle has witnessed June Bug feeding Boo nothing but fast food--- including a 20-piece chicken nuggets that she gobbled down in a hot minute. In fact, June lets her meal ticket eat anything she wants. Which is not awesome. Way to grow an obese child who now is susceptible to a host of life-threatening illnesses.
But... some positives here:
1. At least Boo Boo won't get trapped in one of June's folds.
2. Perhaps Boo Boo can star in a Godzilla-like remake: "Here Comes Honey Boom Boom".
We can hope that you will burst like the pimple that you truly are!
"Wanna see my 'Vinnie Barbarino'?"
#1 JOHN TRAVOLTA
OFFENSE: Beyond creeptastic
The most disturbing "performance" from the Oscars was Travolta's molestation of Scarlett Johansson and Idina Menzel. On stage, he awkwardly cupped Idina's face; backstage, he puckered-up to Scar Jo-- who looked mortified. His rep is saying all that touchy feely uncomfortable-ness was planned. Yeah-- by him, but not by the ladies!
What gives? Are you trying to convince us that you really, really, totally like women? Are you trying to distract us from your awful wig and erase our knowledge that you prefer young, taut men? Or were you fantasizing that these women were a shirtless Justin Bieber?
What's next? A Cosby-esque evening of "hot cocoa" and "hot cock-a-doodle"-don't?
And this spoof sketch you did about secreting enzymes and such? EWWWW!
On this day, I declare you: John RAVOLTA!
OFFENSE: Beyond creeptastic
The most disturbing "performance" from the Oscars was Travolta's molestation of Scarlett Johansson and Idina Menzel. On stage, he awkwardly cupped Idina's face; backstage, he puckered-up to Scar Jo-- who looked mortified. His rep is saying all that touchy feely uncomfortable-ness was planned. Yeah-- by him, but not by the ladies!
What gives? Are you trying to convince us that you really, really, totally like women? Are you trying to distract us from your awful wig and erase our knowledge that you prefer young, taut men? Or were you fantasizing that these women were a shirtless Justin Bieber?
What's next? A Cosby-esque evening of "hot cocoa" and "hot cock-a-doodle"-don't?
And this spoof sketch you did about secreting enzymes and such? EWWWW!
On this day, I declare you: John RAVOLTA!
PHOTO CREDITS:
John Travolta: https://www.flickr.com/photos/lauraleedooley/
Honey Boo Boo: https://www.flickr.com/photos/lwpkommunikacio/
Giuliana Rancic: https://www.flickr.com/photos/shankbone/
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