​Offenders for the week ending April 19, 2019:
#3 DINA LOHAN
Because everyone smelled a "catfish" and she finally did, too, Dina has dumped the man she was going to marry-- the she'd never met in person after five years. That hurts my head. Dina said she had gotten suspicious of Jesse Nadler. He does exist. But, he "didn't have the best intentions." What? You mean there are people out there who are ill-intended that take advantage of lesser-intelligent/desperate-for-love people? The two were going to finally meet, but they got into a fight and broke up. Or is that a lie?
"Dina was already suspicious that he was media hungry and she is in talks about doing several new shows, including a dating show... This guy wants his 15 minutes of fame-- he just proved her suspicions correct."
Again, it only took FIVE YEARS! Their relationship probably would've lasted longer had Dina not revealed his identity and their story on Celebrity Big Brother. Oh, the reason they never saw each other? She lives in NYC and he lives in Cali and is taking care of his sick momma, so he can't travel.
Here's some advice: when in doubt, keep your legs shut and your mind open.
"Dina was already suspicious that he was media hungry and she is in talks about doing several new shows, including a dating show... This guy wants his 15 minutes of fame-- he just proved her suspicions correct."
Again, it only took FIVE YEARS! Their relationship probably would've lasted longer had Dina not revealed his identity and their story on Celebrity Big Brother. Oh, the reason they never saw each other? She lives in NYC and he lives in Cali and is taking care of his sick momma, so he can't travel.
Here's some advice: when in doubt, keep your legs shut and your mind open.
#2 BILLIE LEE, smaller "star" on the reality show Vanderpump Rules
FYI: The pic above is not Billie Lee. Someday, she'll be gif worth.
What a brave story of Billie Lee, budding reality TV star. Billie was in gender transition when she appeared on the show and the reality nation fell in love with her. And now, she's just a big bully. It's apparent she's trying to stir up the shizz to keep her role on the popular Bravo TV show. Unfortunately, she's throwing serious shade at her co-stars and accusing them of bias against transgendered folk-- which is a big, ol' lie. And... she's all bent because she hasn't become besties with the gals on the show.
Queen bee and fellow "star" Stassi Schroeder dishes:
"It's not that she doesn't fit, because if she tried to fit, she would. If she was actually nice and kind and friendly to us, I think she would..."
Wait. We should try to be nice to each other? And not feel entitled?
Here's some advice: all relationships are a dance, not a kidnap-you-and-throw-you-in-the-trunk kind of thing.
Queen bee and fellow "star" Stassi Schroeder dishes:
"It's not that she doesn't fit, because if she tried to fit, she would. If she was actually nice and kind and friendly to us, I think she would..."
Wait. We should try to be nice to each other? And not feel entitled?
Here's some advice: all relationships are a dance, not a kidnap-you-and-throw-you-in-the-trunk kind of thing.
#1 KAITLYN BRISTOWE
I'm not cool, so I don't know who this chick is-- other than she's gotta be famous for whatever reason. She and her boyfriend Jason Tartick (guess these two twits were on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette?) are in love. And she's decided to share way too much information with us.
The two met up after talking for a while, and after they appeared on some other reality TV show. When asked about their first hookup, she spared no detail:
"I was on my period. This is a natural thing for women. We don't have to act like it's weird. We all get our periods... So I was like, 'Yo, let's dry hump.' So we did... In five minutes, he picked my nose and gave me an orgasm. So yeah, it was good. I mean, dry humping will get you if it's been a while. Then he looks at me after and goes, 'Aw. you've got a booger.' And then he picked my nose, and I was like, 'We're it. This is happening.'"
Oh, and said orgasm was the best of her life... with Mr. Booger Picker.
I just... Please.
Here's some advice: for the love of all things sacred, don't share your bowel movements with us.
P.S. I'm sure these two will have one of those Love Toilets like on that SNL skit.
The two met up after talking for a while, and after they appeared on some other reality TV show. When asked about their first hookup, she spared no detail:
"I was on my period. This is a natural thing for women. We don't have to act like it's weird. We all get our periods... So I was like, 'Yo, let's dry hump.' So we did... In five minutes, he picked my nose and gave me an orgasm. So yeah, it was good. I mean, dry humping will get you if it's been a while. Then he looks at me after and goes, 'Aw. you've got a booger.' And then he picked my nose, and I was like, 'We're it. This is happening.'"
Oh, and said orgasm was the best of her life... with Mr. Booger Picker.
I just... Please.
Here's some advice: for the love of all things sacred, don't share your bowel movements with us.
P.S. I'm sure these two will have one of those Love Toilets like on that SNL skit.
RSS Feed