Let's raise our slap hand and get this thing done!
Offenders for the week ending March 11th, 2022:
#3 GRIMES
I appreciate artists. We think differently than most. But the uber-strangeness and overreaching deep-thinking of some artists is just exhausting. And stupid. For example, Grimes and her baby daddy Elon Musk have two children together. The first, a boy named X Æ A-12 (which she pronounces as “X A.I. Archangel”.) And now, the couple welcome a daughter, Exa Dark Sideræl, nicknamed Y.
She explains her daughter's name like this...
"Exa refers to a supercomputing term, exaFLOPS. Dark, represents the unknown. People fear it but truly it's the absence of photons. Dark matter is the beautiful mystery of our universe. Sideræl, the third part, is pronounced 'sigh-deer-ee-el' a more elven" spelling of sidereal, which is the true time of the universe, star time, deep space time, not our relative earth time."
Some kid at the prep school is gonna call her "Flaps" and then it's game-on...
She explains her daughter's name like this...
"Exa refers to a supercomputing term, exaFLOPS. Dark, represents the unknown. People fear it but truly it's the absence of photons. Dark matter is the beautiful mystery of our universe. Sideræl, the third part, is pronounced 'sigh-deer-ee-el' a more elven" spelling of sidereal, which is the true time of the universe, star time, deep space time, not our relative earth time."
Some kid at the prep school is gonna call her "Flaps" and then it's game-on...
#2 HEIDI MONTAG
"I could sure go for raw bison heart"-- said no one EVER. Except for Heidi. She was spotted at an LA eatery recently with her sack lunch of bison heart. She says she's eating it to help with her fertility issues.
Oh, come on! Yes, in Game of Thrones Khaleesi ate a horse's heart-- but how did that turn out for her? Badly. But Heidi really wants a second baby, and thinks this will help.
"I love trying new things! I've always been very interested in various types of diets. When you think about where the most nutrients are that are bio available to humans without toxins, organs are very nutritious parts of animals. Culturally, organs are a critical part. Eating raw liver is going to preserve as many nutrients as possible."
She says she feels "incredible" on this diet. No, it's the e-coli flowing through your veins...
I. Can't.
Oh, come on! Yes, in Game of Thrones Khaleesi ate a horse's heart-- but how did that turn out for her? Badly. But Heidi really wants a second baby, and thinks this will help.
"I love trying new things! I've always been very interested in various types of diets. When you think about where the most nutrients are that are bio available to humans without toxins, organs are very nutritious parts of animals. Culturally, organs are a critical part. Eating raw liver is going to preserve as many nutrients as possible."
She says she feels "incredible" on this diet. No, it's the e-coli flowing through your veins...
I. Can't.
#1 CLAYTON ECHARD, The Bachelor
And they say we women are drama. HA HA HA HA! Oh, you men can give us a run for our money any day of the week! Case in point, The Bachelor-whore. I'll give him props for "being transparent" and "honest" with his final three ladies. But let's call you out for how you appeared on the show this season-- a man-ho ruled by his wiener. And yes, while you are on the show to "explore" your relationships, you confessed your love to all three women, and then "explored" two of them during Fantasy Suites. And you weren't so tender with your truth bomb. Like, you nuked your own truth bomb with all the bumblin' and stumblin'.
You broke the hearts of Susie and Gabby and Rachel. You were left alone in Iceland, wang in your sad hand. But Susie agreed to date you after the finale. And you two are in love. But for how long?
Hopefully, you're a one-taco man now.
You broke the hearts of Susie and Gabby and Rachel. You were left alone in Iceland, wang in your sad hand. But Susie agreed to date you after the finale. And you two are in love. But for how long?
Hopefully, you're a one-taco man now.
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