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Just Don't Do It

7/12/2019

 
​Offenders for the week ending July 12, 2019:

via GIPHY

#3 JORDYN WOODS
This trollop's only claim to fame is that she's friends with a Jenner and got close with a Kardashian's man. But, she continues to feel the need to speak about her dalliance with Tristan Thompson. Cuz it wasn't her fault. And her character is being assassinated. Because she was a true friend to one of the Jenner girls and she somehow thought Tristan was no longer with Khloe K, but they were and she didn't know that (?). And, she has not gained anything from being a part of the Kardashian/Jenner klan:

"I definitely work very hard for a lot of the things that I have, and as you can see, I'm out here hustling and I've always been working. I started modeling when I was 18 and, you know, I work hard."

Okay... Well, I'll give you this-- you've used the scandal to your advantage, launching some clothing collection. Now, you can make your own money. What a change!

Hey, tramp. Can you zip your lips (both sets) and go away?

via GIPHY

#2 TAYLOR SWIFT
TayTay has some strange mind control over fans. Like, seriously. She can do no wrong. She could hurl into a microphone and it would sell millions of copies. But I'm starting to think that she isn't the perfect princess, and is using her mesmerized public to create a reality that might not be real. Case in point: this whole beef with Scooter Braun over his purchase of her old record label, Big Machine, and the ownership of her old masters. 

Look, we all know that every facet of the entertainment business is shady-- be it radio, TV, film, or music. Deals are made to the disadvantage of the artist all the time. Is it fair? Hell, no! But I'm starting to think Taylor's perception of her misdealings with her old label are not completely accurate. She claims she couldn't buy back her back catalogue of music. But her own father had ownership in Big Machine, so that's... suspicious. And instead of going directly to the source, she decided to spew via social media. 

What do you hope to gain? A win? Your fans not supporting Big Machine artists? An uprising against Scooter and Justin Bieber? If you were truly harassed by these people, that's one thing. But if you're trying to fuel the #MeToo/bullying fire, then that's irresponsible. Some battles are best left out of the spotlight. And if your label owned your catalogue, perhaps your parents should've negotiated a better deal for you when you were a kid.

via GIPHY

#1 NIKE
What. The. F&ck. Why is Colin Isadick dictating what you do as a company? Seriously. Nike was set to release a limited edition shoe featuring the flag Betsy Ross designed-- but Colin was offended-- because the flag was created during a time when slavery was around. 

Get. Over. It. Slavery is a part of the history of this country. Can't change that. The flag of Betsy Ross doesn't glorify slavery. It glorifies pride in our country. What's ironic, is that Colin is a slave to the past. Learn from the past and not repeat mistakes made. That's how you make change. Taking down statues and not teaching certain things in school won't change history. And have we ever figured out if Colin's family history included slaves? If so, horrible. But that situation also gave his lineage the opportunity to, I don't know, have a family member become an overly-paid NFL player.

Nike-- for a sporting shoe company, you surely have no balls. 

P.S. Please, don't use the color yellow in your shoes ever because I'm half Asian and people call us yellow people and that's offensive... 

Who's Your Mac-n-Cheese Daddy?

2/28/2019

 
Offenders for the week ending March 1, 2019:

via GIPHY

#3 ROBERT KRAFT
The owner of the New (nude) England Patriots has entered (LOL) a not guilty plea to soliciting prostitution after back-to-back visits to Orchids of Asia "spa" in Jupiter, Florida. Robert, why? was your heart broken by the death of your wife and the gold-digging ways of your 39-year-old former girlfriend? Did you feel that visiting a "pro" would be drama free?

You have a gajillion dollars. You could've bought some classy, drama free, primo kitty time. Or in this case, a hands-on experience and skin flute action. You had to have known you would've been caught. The name of the spa alone puts the illegal activity on blast. Any Asian "spa" that offers table showers, massages, and body treatments will "arouse" suspicion, so to speak. 

But maybe we have it all wrong. Here are two thoughts:

1. You caught Yellow Fever. There is no cure. You just need more yellow attention.
2. You are a known philanthropist. Perhaps you've become a "feel-anthropist."

Whatever the case, let's cue your theme song: "I Did it For the Nookie".

via GIPHY

#2 TRISTAN THOMPSON
They teach you ball control on the court, how about trying it in your pants? After getting caught cheating while your girlfriend Khloe Kardashian was preggo with your daughter, you'd think you'd think with that stuff between your ears. Apparently, that thing between your legs is the dominant force in this saga. 

This lowdown, dirty butt pimple was caught with his hand in Jordyn Woods' cookie jar. Oh, Jordyn-with-a-Y is Kylie Jenner's BFF. Kylie, of course, is Khloe's sis. Ewwwwww! 

The two were "making out" at someone's house party. And they may have rolled around while Jordyn was roommates with Kylie. Tristan, Tristan, Tristan. There are millions of women in the world. Why must you dip so close to home? Are you earning "frequent Kardashian rider points"? Is this some kind of six-degrees-of-Kardashian sex game?

One day, your weener is going to rebel... 

via GIPHY

#1 JORDYN WOODS
Congratulations! You've won the Slutbag Skank Award. Why are you tops this week and Tristan isn't? Because you could've said "no" to inviting a spoken-for man's Oscar Mayer into your den of doom. Sources say:

                 "This is out of character for Jordyn and no one expected this to happen."

Sure.  Like the old saying goes: "It takes two two tango". If half of the equation is unavailable, then the dancing can't happen. Perhaps you've taken up "snake charming" as a vocation? And Tristan's was available for practice? Way to ruin your BFF relationship, your friendship with Khloe, and now you're labeled a tramp. Maybe you want to become Kim K famous. Don't hold your breath.

Quit treating your crotch like it's a Golden Corral.

Call Me "Sue"

10/20/2017

 
Offenders for the week ending October 20, 2017:
Picture
"Foiled again..."
​#3 BLAC CHYNA
Blac Chyna is very angry at the Kardashians. So, she's suing them for "assault, battery, domestic violence, defamation and interference with prospective economic relations." Her lawyer had this to say:

"Rob Kardashian is an abuser intent on destroying the mother of his baby, who left him in 2016. In revenge, the Kardashian-Jenner family became media predators, slut-shamming her on social media and killing her hit television show, which had already begun filming a second season."

Uh, slut-shamming. You did that on your own with your own behavior. Weren't you a former "model" and stripper? And I'm not talking about posing for Vogue or dancing in Vegas. And your "hit" TV show? HA HA HA HA HA HA!

You're an opportunistic sociopath who purposefully manipulated Rob K and his emotional instability to get what you wanted, you gold digger. You're just angry that he got wise and got rid of you and now you have nothing to fall back on except for child support-- and that monstrous ass of yours!

Here's a thought: Shut your legs and your mouth and disappear, you nut bucket!

Picture
"My name's Larry. And I'm an ass."
#2 LARRY FLYNT
No offense, but I thought this dude was all ready six feet under. Or maybe I assumed he was just six feet under a pile of STD's and other filth. This purveyor of porn took out a full-page ad in The Washington Post offering $10 million for "information leading to the impeachment and removal from office of Donald J. Trump." 

Sigh...

This is getting old. Yes, let's turn our entire democratic process upside down by throwing a petulant toddler tantrum and demanding "justice" because we didn't like the outcome. Well, Lar has a list of reasons for Trump's ousting. 

Okay. Let's get to the naked truth, so to speak. You're just jealous because you've had political ambitions and you've failed numerous times. You're a pathetic pile of pube lice. 

Impeaching Trump doesn't get you an automatic Democrat in the White House. Next in line is the Vice President-- who's a Republican; Who's an ultra conservative. Is that what you really want? And don't think you can impeach people until you get a Democrat. Since it's been ancient history the last time you were in the classroom, I suppose this minor detail in the succession of power slipped by you-- like your morals and decency. If you had any in the first place.

Picture
"It's not easy being me..."
#1 COLIN KAEPERNICK
When in doubt, sue! Colin's been sidelined since last year. He'll forever been known as the person who refused to stand for the national anthem:

"I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color... To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder."

Good for you going all First Amendment. Of course, some would argue that the flag also symbolizes a nation of opportunity where a person can get paid millions of dollars to play a sport. But I digress. 

No one has picked up Colin for their team. He even went so far as to dive into the pool of hypocrisy by saying he'd stand for the anthem if he can play in the NFL again. Way to stand by your convictions! But that didn't work, so now he's suing. His claim: team owners are colluding against him and won't hire him. Reality check: You're not that good!

Let's check the stats: ​
Picture
​Yup. He's the middle of the pack. Thirteen quarterbacks are worse than C.K., five are the same and 14 are better. That's why no one's kickin' your door in to sign you. It's not because of your drama. The NFL is drama and controversy. 

Now you can spend your days lecturing and informing the masses about the injustices in our nation because you truly care, right?

​PHOTO CREDIT:
www.giphy.com

Graphic from www.profootballfocus.com

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    I lovingly call out celebs for their naughty behavior. Sometimes a 'slap' is a needed wake-up call. ;)

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