Let's raise our slap hand and get this thing done!
Offenders for the week ending November 13th, 2020:
#3 LARSA PIPPEN
The ex-wife of former NBA legend Scottie Pippen is back in the spotlight after spilling her own tea on her own messy sitch with the Kardashian sisters. Guess Larsa used to be Kim's bestie, and now the entire family doesn't speak to her. And it's all Kanye's fault:
"Maybe because I blocked him on my phone because I couldn't bear taking his calls anymore... So, he turned that into, 'Oh, she's this and she's that.' They all started to ride his wave. If you're that easily swayed, like the wind, then do I really give a f&ck? Should I give a f&ck?"
Apparently you give two f&cks, because you're talking publicly about it. Then, in your little podcast confessional you said how you've been through so much with the family and you will always love them. Blah, blah, blah, and you feel like one day you can all reconcile. Methinks you opening your trap (and perhaps your legs to Khloe's on-again-off-again meat deliverer, Tristan Thompson) isn't the way to get back in there.
A phone call or good ol' fashioned letter might be more appropriate. Or better yet, take your skank ass back to Hoe Town and let it go...
"Maybe because I blocked him on my phone because I couldn't bear taking his calls anymore... So, he turned that into, 'Oh, she's this and she's that.' They all started to ride his wave. If you're that easily swayed, like the wind, then do I really give a f&ck? Should I give a f&ck?"
Apparently you give two f&cks, because you're talking publicly about it. Then, in your little podcast confessional you said how you've been through so much with the family and you will always love them. Blah, blah, blah, and you feel like one day you can all reconcile. Methinks you opening your trap (and perhaps your legs to Khloe's on-again-off-again meat deliverer, Tristan Thompson) isn't the way to get back in there.
A phone call or good ol' fashioned letter might be more appropriate. Or better yet, take your skank ass back to Hoe Town and let it go...
#2 CLARE CRAWLEY, former title "character" from The Bachelorette
As predicted, Clare has left her season of the reality TV show-- 4 episodes in. Because she fell in love with former NFL wide receiver Dale Moss in 4 seconds. Literally. The moment he stepped out of the limo to meet her she said he was her future husband. Yes, the two are engaged and now shopping for bi-costal homes. And of course, there are babies in the future!
What?
She is on the warp-speed path now that she's got a man on lockdown. In one of the most uncomfortable moments from this week's show, host Chris Harrison checked in with the couple and asked what was next for them. Clare quickly, and manically shouted out: "BABIES!" And then, there was silence. From Dale. And the viewing audience. We get it, Clare. You were the oldest Bachelorette at 39 and that damned bio clock is ticking loudly. But you need better game. At least play an under-the-radar-psycho and put holes in the condoms.
Run Dale. You've got skills. I was all #TeamClare, but now I'm afraid for you.
What?
She is on the warp-speed path now that she's got a man on lockdown. In one of the most uncomfortable moments from this week's show, host Chris Harrison checked in with the couple and asked what was next for them. Clare quickly, and manically shouted out: "BABIES!" And then, there was silence. From Dale. And the viewing audience. We get it, Clare. You were the oldest Bachelorette at 39 and that damned bio clock is ticking loudly. But you need better game. At least play an under-the-radar-psycho and put holes in the condoms.
Run Dale. You've got skills. I was all #TeamClare, but now I'm afraid for you.
#1 JEFFREY TOOBIN
If you recall, the writer for The New Yorker was suspended three weeks ago after he was caught opining-- actually, o-penising-- on camera during a Zoom meeting with co-workers. Yup. He was handling his Oscar Mayer. It's not that he meant to choke the chicken on camera. See, he thought he had turned it off, but... Seriously, dude. Are you a stupid, pimply teenage boy that can't wait until your meeting is over to put in your piece for the New Yanker? What inspired you during this meeting? One of your co-workers? Vurp. Anywho, Goobin and his employer have consciously uncoupled:
"I was fired today after 27 years as a Staff Writer. I will always love the magazine, will miss my colleagues, and will look forward to reading their work."
I'm sure you'll be jerkin' the gherkin while "reading their work." Seems he was trying to stroke some sympathy with his social media post. Let's see who feels sorry for this jerk (off).................................................................................................No one.
You know people are gonna forever yell "hand check" at you, don't you?
"I was fired today after 27 years as a Staff Writer. I will always love the magazine, will miss my colleagues, and will look forward to reading their work."
I'm sure you'll be jerkin' the gherkin while "reading their work." Seems he was trying to stroke some sympathy with his social media post. Let's see who feels sorry for this jerk (off).................................................................................................No one.
You know people are gonna forever yell "hand check" at you, don't you?
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