Fart the friendly skies...
Of "air biscuits"!
Air travel is painful enough. Let alone when some testicle beater on your flight decides to stank up the enclosed area with their ass ocarina symphony. Some dude on a flight to Amsterdam from Dubai refused to put a cork in it when asked by his two Dutch victims to stop with the fart attack.
Then, things went south. The flight crew was useless, so a fight broke out and the pilot had to turn the plane around. If you're nervous about flying, take something ahead of time!
Perhaps airlines need to hand out bottles of Beano with those snacks before someone shoves those Stroopwafels up someone's stink emitter.
Fart the friendly skies...
I've said it many times-- hats off to our men and women in blue. They go into dangerous situations while we're trying to escape them. They answer the call when needed. And they have to deal with sketchy folk. Sigh.
If I'm facing federal gun and drug charges, I might be a little more respectful. But I'm no criminal, and criminals aren't known for clear-thinking and upstanding morals.
Sean A. Sykes Jr. will go down in history for his handling of a recent interrogation. Of course he knew nuthin' about nuthin' about the crime-- but he does know methane. Home brewed methane.
Most of us would answer questions with our words. For example:
Detective: "What's your address?"
Most of Society: "123 Whatever Street."
But this is not how Mr. Sykes handled the situation. He decided to be more silent but deadly...
In his report, the interviewing detective asked Sykes about his address. Then this happened:
"Mr. Sykes leaned to one side of his chair and released a loud fart before answering."
This whole thing stinks to high Heaven, but I am impressed. To fart on demand is a skill. I wonder when the next cycle of America's Got Talent is...
Perhaps Lord FARTleroy was inspired by this:
I have to say it again: I LOVE THE JAPANESE-- you freaky, techy peeps!
I don't think Shakespeare would approve-- or maybe he would-- because this does seem like a tragedy in the making:
It's no secret the Japanese menfolk are down with the down-under symphonies. They've been known to pay a handsome some for ladies to eat cans of beans and make a... musical... in their faces.
Hey, we're not judging!
The latest: a trio of Japanese adult film stars took to the stage recently to break wind for a paying audience. The show organizers had a lofty goal in mind:
"... to bring joy to Japan's 120 million fart fans and to... test the women to the limit of their intestines."
It won't be all that bad. This is a variety show! The lovey fartists will:
"fart while wearing street clothes; fart while wearing swim suits; and farts while wearing cosplay outfits-- that will stimulate your sense of sight and smell."
Well, at least the fart-tresses are expanding their horizons.
Maybe they'll embark on a whirlwind tour? Sorry. I couldn't resist. The pun. I can resist the show.
For original story, click HERE.
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