OFFENSE: Insincere fakey fake
I really shouldn't be surprised to hear that she's praying, because it's safe to assume she's already down on her knees... a lot. Anywho, my B.S. meter is going off like crazy. In a recent blog post, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star sent her "heartfelt prayers" out to the families who lost loved ones on the downed Germanwings flight. Okay, that was... touching. Then she ruined what might have been a sincere sentiment by throwing in that she's praying for LeAnn Rimes-- the woman who stole her husband away and eventually married him.
I'm sure you're praying for her. For her torturous demise. For the failure of her career. For a bus to run her over.
First of all, NO ONE believes you pray. Unless it's to the bottom-of-a-booze-bottle-god. You are the meanest, nastiest alley cat that ever slinked down the street.
And secondly, you are an expert at making everything-- even a tragedy-- about you.
Here's a thought: pray for yourself, because you're an embarrassment to the entire gender!
Not only is he an annoying, self-absorbed, narcissistic bung, he's a complete control freak. Over other people. Like his wife. I can't believe I actually feel a smidge sorry for Kim Kardashian. He's convinced she needs to drop 15 pounds-- and he's in charge of it!
Kim currently weighs 135, but her goal weight is 120. Her trainer was shocked, saying she couldn't imagine Kim that light. That's when Colonel Kanye jumped in and swore at the trainer, telling her that if Kim needs to lose weight in her toes, then she needs to find a way to eliminate "toe weight".
This weight loss should actually be no problem for Kanye, since he thinks he's Jesus. Couldn't he turn her fat into gold or something?
Here's a way we can all drop an easy 15 pounds-- by cutting off your head. Yes? Good idea?
P.S. Happy Easter. I hope your father-in-law shoves a row of peeps up your...
OFFENSE: Bigger than his britches
Chet Haze, aka Chester M. Hanks, is the son of Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson-- and a damn fine rapper! And he's angry. And he holds a grudge. Howard Stern dared to make fun of him back in 2011. Well, when MC CoochHurt recently appeared on Eminem's Sirius channel, the scab ripped away...and Chet Cheeto went off on Stern via Twitter. He tweeted:
“Let me come up on your show b*itch… Come catch this fade … have me live on the air and we can go pound for pound see who looks like the fool you dried up old c*nt … easy to talk sh*t in a closed off room p*ssy, have me up there in the studio with you let’s give the ppl what they want.”
When Stern didn't tweet back, Chetley got violent:
“Howie… Do you have any idea how badly I am going to assault you when I see you… You can’t run from me forever knock knees … Howie… Listen. One day, maybe tomorrow, maybe 10 years from now, I am going to see you in person, and I am going to hurt you… I hope you travel with security!!! PLEASE have me on the show.”
Wow. Tom and Rita must be so proud. Another example of a child of privilege not happy with his life, and wanting that real street hustle life. Go live off your trust fund and STFU!
By the way, why go by the name Chet? WTF is a "Chet"? Sounds like something leftover from a nasty toilet session...
Here's Stern and company ripping Chetty. FYI: NSFW!
Brandi Glanville: https://www.flickr.com/photos/63848154@N05/
Kanye West: https://www.flickr.com/photos/jasonpersse/
Chet Haze: https://www.flickr.com/photos/charlottebodakphotography/ (her photography is fab!)